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One time, I gave (or maybe I should say "tried to give") Eliza a lesson on how to soft smile. After the basic "smile without your teeth" command, I nudged on with "relax your jaw" or "squint your eyes." Eliza took all the these requests to the extreme, making outlandish expressions. She was never one for dainty... well, dainty anything. That is what made her so great — she was bold and unapologetic in everything that she did. This was the best "soft smile" she did all night.

Even as a baby, Eliza had the ability to play alone and concentrate on the little worlds she created. Over the years, she often came to my house and played with that same focus and seriousness. Her ability to read so many books over the years was no doubt one of the gifts of this ability.

In July 2022, we all went to California to visit Eliza’s places. After a stop in Menlo Park we squished into a car together to drive to Serene Lakes. Camille and I are not easy on road trips but Eliza made being in the car both enjoyable and cozy. Once we were finally on the road, we pulled down the TV and saw that the Banchoff-Grovers had already had the Sound of Music running! Kit and Carlos had never seen it before and the rest of us knew every single song. Eliza and Camille, in the front seat, knew most of the words. It was the same feeling as road trips with my family. The childlike joy of watching new lands pass out the window, the comfort of watching an old favorite, and the ease of living with people you love.

During our college years, Eliza and I were both in New England, separated by only an hour long drive. We got to see each other a lot which was extra special considering we grew up on separate coasts. Every year I got particularly excited for the Harvard vs. Brown volleyball game because I knew that would mean Eliza would come to Boston, where I attended college. This particular game was her junior year (my senior), and Brown came from behind and beat Harvard on their senior night! I felt so lucky to be able to watch and cheer her on. I will always look back at my college years and smile with gratitude for having been able to spend so much quality time with Eliza.

My earliest photo of Eliza on the volleyball court — she was playing on an elementary school team. She was meant for greatness!

Eliza and her MA volleyball team made the trip up to San Francisco to play against my high school (St. Ignatius). I was a loud and proud supporter in the crowd, cheering every time SI scored one against the Bears; with one exception. Every time MA's 6-foot beautiful blonde hitter came flying through the air and obliterated the SI block for a point (which happened often), I was the loudest one in the room. As my mom taught me from birth, family over everything. Eliza was, and always will be, family. While I have no idea who won that game, I will forever cherish getting to watch Eliza play the sport she loved so much. After the game, we shared some good-natured ribbing and teasing over who's team was better as all true siblings do.

My memory of Eliza is from our post college trip when Casey and I went out to visit Eliza in Seattle. We hadn't seen each other in a while and it was so great to see her so adult, picking us up in the white Highlander like old times and meeting all her roommates and people in Seattle. She had work at 5am but that didn't stop us from staying up and doing a movie night. We went on a walk the next day, she talked about training for her first marathon, and it turned into a rare sunny day! We could tell how much she loved Seattle and her people there, and couldn't wait to come back to visit her in the summer.

The times spent at the Serene Lakes house were some of the happiest for our extended family. Eliza was always a good sport: taking care of the younger cousins, leading hikes, playing beach volleyball, skiing, canoeing, or being the bottom of a cousin dog pile.

One of my absolute favorite memories of Eliza is making acapella voice memos with her. On the way to practice one evening, just after we finished dinner in the vdub (the dining hall), we were walking to the gym for practice. Somehow, Eliza and I started being goofy and trying to sing Khalid’s song “Talk.” It all started when one of us started trying to beat box the beat of the song and the other one started singing the lyrics. Before we knew it we were recording voice memos on my phone with Bailie and Chow, with each of us playing a different role in the acapella song (some people beat boxing, others singing lyrics). We started recording different versions and different songs and by the end of it, we were all laughing so hard we weren’t even able to do acapella anymore. I still go back and listen to the voice memos to hear Eliza’s voice. 🩷